Raping with the Eyes…
By Adil ibn Manzoor Khan with inputs by Asma bint Saeed
Are you one of those who check out ladies on the streets , bus , train or anywhere you see them ? You check her out and in a flash you can tell all about her size and shape. You can also tell color of her lipstick , how her hair was done and what clothes she was wearing , etc ,etc ….
Do you end up saying “wow”…
In modern western terms this is called : Checking her out.
Its also called : Raping with the Eyes.
Rape : The crime of forcing another person to submit to sex acts, especially sexual intercourse
But hey , we did not do anything. We did not even touched or talked with her. How could i have “raped” her with my eyes ? For that ask yourself say… Did not you look at places where you are not allowed to look at non-mehram women ? Somewhere in your mind , you got a naughty thought about her. All said and done…. let us now look from ladies point of view ? Well “THEY DO NOT LIKE IT AT ALL” .
Jareer ibn Abdullaah said: “I asked the Messenger of Allaah (pbuh) about an accidental glance at a woman. He commanded me to turn my gaze away.” (Reported by al-Tirmidhi). Commenting on this hadeeth, al-Mubaarakpoori said: “Accidental” means that his gaze fell on a non-mahram woman unintentionally. “He commanded me to turn my gaze away” means that we are not to look a second time, because the first glance was not by choice and would be forgiven, but any further glances would be counted as sin, and we should heed the words of Allaah (interpretation of the meaning): “Tell the believing men to lower their gaze (from looking at forbidden things)…” [al-Noor 24:30]”
The Messenger of Allaah (pbuh) said: “O Ali, do not follow a glance with another, for you will be forgiven for the first, but not for the second.” (Reported by al-Tirmidhi)
And if you think that Allah swt does not know where you were looking and what thought went through your mind ? Allah says, “Allah knows the fraud of the eyes, and all that the breasts conceal.” (Surah Ghafir 40:19).
“The adultery of the eyes is the sight (to gaze at a forbidden thing), the adultery of the tongue is the talk,… and the inner self wishes and desires and the private parts testify all this or deny it.” [Sahih Al-Bukhari (no. 6612), Muslim, Ahmed].
Misconception among men We are allowed to look (meaning stare/gaze) at non-muslims women. We are allowed to look at the exposed parts of the ladies those who have exposed themselves. We are ONLY NOT allowed look at muslim girls & it is a sin to look (meaning to stare/gaze) at a muslim lady wearing burkha/hijab. But hey , even if it is sin , it is a minor sin.
The prophet (pbuh) has said “Beware of small sins because small sins when accumulated turn in to a big fire…” You must have all heard this hadith : Ibn Abbas narrated that the Messenger of Allah (saws) passed by two graves and said, “One of them is (getting punishment in the grave) for not cleaning himself after urine….” Related by Bukhari and Muslim. So when the person goes through such a severe punishment for “small sins”… then you be rest assured that your these so called “small sins” (done on daily basis) have turned in a big heap of fire. One of the fitnahs (temptations) with which we are tested is the fitnah of women, as the Prophet (pbuh) said: “I have not left behind me any fitnah (temptation) more harmful to men than women.”
What needs to be done:
1 – Faith in Allaah. Faith in Allaah and fear of Allaah provide a safety valve and protect a person against committing haraam actions and following his own whims and desires. If the believer becomes aware that Allaah is always watching and if he ponders the meanings of His names and attributes, such as the All-Knowing, the All-Hearing, the All-Seeing, the Watchful, the Reckoner, the Preserver, the All-Encompassing, that will generate fear of Him in secret and in public, and will put a stop to disobedience towards Allaah, and will reduce the strength of desire that leads many people to commit haraam actions.
2 – Lowering the gaze and avoiding looking at haraam things The gaze can generate bad thoughts in the heart, which then lead to ideas and then to desires, then to will and resolve, and then inevitably to doing haraam things. Think about the meaning of this verse which makes a connection between the first steps towards haraam and the end result. Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning): “Tell the believing men to lower their gaze (from looking at forbidden things), and protect their private parts (from illegal sexual acts). That is purer for them. Verily, Allaah is All-Aware of what they do” [al-Noor 24:30]
3 – Warding off evil thoughts Bad thoughts pose a danger to the heart… If a person dwells on them and does not push them away, they will develop into an idea, then into will and resolve, then this will inevitably lead to haraam actions. Beware of dwelling on passing thoughts; rather what you must do is to ward them off and crowd them out with good thoughts. The treatment, then, is to ward off these passing thoughts and keep yourself busy with beneficial thoughts.
4 – Marriage It was narrated that Abd-Allaah ibn Masood said: The Prophet (pbuh) said: “O young men, whoever among you can afford it, let him get married, and whoever cannot, let him fast, for it will be a shield for him.” Narrated by al-Bukhari.
5 – Fasting – because of the hadeeth quoted above, in which it says, “…and whoever cannot, let him fast, for it will be a shield for him.” Narrated by al-Bukhari. The less a person eats, the weaker his desire becomes, and the weaker his desire is, the less sins he commits.
6 – Keeping away from bad companions. The Prophet (pbuh) said: “A man will follow the way of his close friends, so let each one of you look at who he takes as a close friend.” Narrated by Abu Dawood.
Courtesy: www.everymuslim.co.za
